Hi Katerina, I’m so grateful and heartened by your considered comments here. Sure makes a difference to hear back from the Substack void! In fact you made my day. Thank you so much.
And yes, it’s a delicate area for me to try and unpack, and difficult to explore with all the many sensitivities and transgenerational damage across the culture. Despite all the rancour and ill will, I’m hoping to kindle a little hope and generosity. Just like your substack, it’s a labour of love, an attempt to skim a small stone of love into the pool and, perhaps create a few more positive ripples.
As you say, finding complementary ways to connect with each other must be the answer, so we’re both doing important work! I also appreciate your posts and they give me inspiration and pause to reflect and learn. Keep going and who knows, maybe we’ll make a difference!
Thank you for your kind answer. I'm glad it made a difference in your day! I understand how challenging it can be to write from a vulnerable place, especially in the current context where seemingly meaningless articles are receiving a lot of attention and popularity.
I also encourage you to continue writing and putting yourself out there. I look forward to reading your perspective.
I'm delighted that my work inspires you; it also comforts me to know that people value it as a labor of love as they are also writing from this place.
I didn't know about Kasia Urbaniak, but I have googled her, and I like what I see.
I'll go into her work and see what is there for me.
Thank you for the suggestion! Have a lovely contemplative week! :) All the best!
Hi. I needed to hear this. You’re right to say what you say and I am definitely generalising in the face of millennia of male atrocity. Men have caused so much pain that it has become the expectation of my sex. But that is why I’m writing this; to speak for the overlooked vast majority of men who are not the way you describe. That much is true. Please take some heart from that and don’t give up on all of us. That said ,the pain that men cause is so grievous, it cannot be ignored and I need to address it or stop writing now. So thank you for speaking out. And for not totally unleashing on me too, which must have been tempting. Your points land fair and square. I hear you and take what you say seriously. All the best to you and thank you for this important challenge. Piers
I really enjoyed your post, as well as the way you acknowledged both men and women's struggles, biology, cultural-economic-shaped behaviors and contexts. Awesome job!
You've made some insightful points about men's and women's archetypes, which are especially important in today's society, where discussing men and women without perpetuating stereotypes is often frowned upon or even taboo, for the right reasons. However, at the same time, we must be able to talk about what we hold in our experience and the way reality is presented.
Understanding that both men and women can be good people, and that both can exhibit toxic and dysfunctional, narcissistic, and other disorders in equal measure, I believe it is true that men have intentionally sought to maintain power, causing the most harm to women.
Our religious landscape, along with cultural and socioeconomic factors, has long shaped our current interactions with one another.
The fear of being direct with men has deep transgenerational roots; men also fear rejection and a lack of usefulness for women for the same reason.
In the current context, I believe that masculinizing women, who primarily embody masculine energies such as "doing," providing, and body language, is a way to gain over the lost and desired power.
This context also serves to integrate the feminine aspects in men, such as "being" and relaxation, enabling them to connect with their previously suppressed emotional and nurturing sides.
This process can and will transform our interactions based on how we already feel around us, form relationships and collaboration, and hopefully harmonize our energies.
I think we can achieve gender and energy freedom if we discover complementary ways to connect with one another. We should write, create, initiate dialogue, and never engage in competition with each other.
Our differences and sameness in some ways, despite our reluctance to acknowledge them, are what sustain our species' existence and growth.
I personally need, respect, love and adore men; I appreciate the hard, dirty work that requires a type of strength that most men possess; and I appreciate the incredible things they can build and create. At the same time, I enjoy how being a woman feels.
I've been fortunate to recognize and contain my femininity and masculinity after unlearning and relearning the world around me, how to feel in my own body and mind, and acknowledging its limitations and natural power.
Thank you for writing about this, as you can see, I was waiting for this topic to be brought up :)!
You need to tell the Taliban about all of your wonderful ideas, dude.
They beat the shit out of their 9 year old wives after telling them they can't go to school.
Then tell the young boys across the United States who make AI porn of their female classmates.
Useful, indeed.
Men are so delusional and incapable of self-awareness that nothing you say should be taken seriously. You're all literally disconnected from history and reality that everything should be discarded.
Do you want me to give you a list of historical events and current situations that disprove every single thing you claim?
Hi Katerina, I’m so grateful and heartened by your considered comments here. Sure makes a difference to hear back from the Substack void! In fact you made my day. Thank you so much.
And yes, it’s a delicate area for me to try and unpack, and difficult to explore with all the many sensitivities and transgenerational damage across the culture. Despite all the rancour and ill will, I’m hoping to kindle a little hope and generosity. Just like your substack, it’s a labour of love, an attempt to skim a small stone of love into the pool and, perhaps create a few more positive ripples.
As you say, finding complementary ways to connect with each other must be the answer, so we’re both doing important work! I also appreciate your posts and they give me inspiration and pause to reflect and learn. Keep going and who knows, maybe we’ll make a difference!
All the best and thanks again.
Piers
Regarding the fear of being direct with men, are you aware of the work of Kasia Urbaniak? If not, check her out.
Thank you for your kind answer. I'm glad it made a difference in your day! I understand how challenging it can be to write from a vulnerable place, especially in the current context where seemingly meaningless articles are receiving a lot of attention and popularity.
I also encourage you to continue writing and putting yourself out there. I look forward to reading your perspective.
I'm delighted that my work inspires you; it also comforts me to know that people value it as a labor of love as they are also writing from this place.
I didn't know about Kasia Urbaniak, but I have googled her, and I like what I see.
I'll go into her work and see what is there for me.
Thank you for the suggestion! Have a lovely contemplative week! :) All the best!
Hi. I needed to hear this. You’re right to say what you say and I am definitely generalising in the face of millennia of male atrocity. Men have caused so much pain that it has become the expectation of my sex. But that is why I’m writing this; to speak for the overlooked vast majority of men who are not the way you describe. That much is true. Please take some heart from that and don’t give up on all of us. That said ,the pain that men cause is so grievous, it cannot be ignored and I need to address it or stop writing now. So thank you for speaking out. And for not totally unleashing on me too, which must have been tempting. Your points land fair and square. I hear you and take what you say seriously. All the best to you and thank you for this important challenge. Piers
I really enjoyed your post, as well as the way you acknowledged both men and women's struggles, biology, cultural-economic-shaped behaviors and contexts. Awesome job!
You've made some insightful points about men's and women's archetypes, which are especially important in today's society, where discussing men and women without perpetuating stereotypes is often frowned upon or even taboo, for the right reasons. However, at the same time, we must be able to talk about what we hold in our experience and the way reality is presented.
Understanding that both men and women can be good people, and that both can exhibit toxic and dysfunctional, narcissistic, and other disorders in equal measure, I believe it is true that men have intentionally sought to maintain power, causing the most harm to women.
Our religious landscape, along with cultural and socioeconomic factors, has long shaped our current interactions with one another.
The fear of being direct with men has deep transgenerational roots; men also fear rejection and a lack of usefulness for women for the same reason.
In the current context, I believe that masculinizing women, who primarily embody masculine energies such as "doing," providing, and body language, is a way to gain over the lost and desired power.
This context also serves to integrate the feminine aspects in men, such as "being" and relaxation, enabling them to connect with their previously suppressed emotional and nurturing sides.
This process can and will transform our interactions based on how we already feel around us, form relationships and collaboration, and hopefully harmonize our energies.
I think we can achieve gender and energy freedom if we discover complementary ways to connect with one another. We should write, create, initiate dialogue, and never engage in competition with each other.
Our differences and sameness in some ways, despite our reluctance to acknowledge them, are what sustain our species' existence and growth.
I personally need, respect, love and adore men; I appreciate the hard, dirty work that requires a type of strength that most men possess; and I appreciate the incredible things they can build and create. At the same time, I enjoy how being a woman feels.
I've been fortunate to recognize and contain my femininity and masculinity after unlearning and relearning the world around me, how to feel in my own body and mind, and acknowledging its limitations and natural power.
Thank you for writing about this, as you can see, I was waiting for this topic to be brought up :)!
You need to tell the Taliban about all of your wonderful ideas, dude.
They beat the shit out of their 9 year old wives after telling them they can't go to school.
Then tell the young boys across the United States who make AI porn of their female classmates.
Useful, indeed.
Men are so delusional and incapable of self-awareness that nothing you say should be taken seriously. You're all literally disconnected from history and reality that everything should be discarded.
Do you want me to give you a list of historical events and current situations that disprove every single thing you claim?
Just stick with video games. This is sad.